Monday, July 26, 2010


I was hiding in the back of the closet. Behind the bagged-up wedding dress, my grandmother's fur coat, and some forgotten summer dresses, that's where I sought refuge. I always find solace in the strangest of places.

Then she called, her name glowing on my cell phone screen like a ghost passing by. Up until that moment, her name was not on my recent calls list. In fact, it had been several months since we had gone our separate ways.

Broken hearts.

We had boarded up the door of friendship that had once been "under construction." It was abandoned, collecting dust.

Until her name glowed in blue. I knew why she was calling. Her pain brushed next to mine, its jagged edges still healing.

"You just need to know, 
no matter what happens, 
you will be ok."

And I wept. By my grandmother's faux fur. By the summer dresses that once soaked up sun. By a dress that now was a stinging reminder of rejection.

Fast forward 16 months or so, and we sit across from one another in a hotel room. Girlfriends have gathered to celebrate new things with me. To breathe life where I feel stale. She hands me a ring that they all purchased together.


"Something that was made beautiful by hammering. By refining. By pressure and hard hand-crafting." I look at their faces, and weep. She continues, "So when you look at it, you'll remember us. You'll remember this time of life. That beauty comes from pain. And we're with you every step of the way."

And she adds... "and every true southern girl needs to own a James Avery piece."

This is a girl who is so beautifully different and similar to me, it's just funny. From this New York girl's perspective, she's a Southern Belle. She's beautiful. Gentleness and sweetness fill her speech and smiles, but don't be fooled... She's not afraid to put someone in their place just when you least expect it. It's just right.

If you were to spend 15 minutes with her, you would hear her confidence, her steady reliance on Grace, and the deep, proven love she has for her husband and her super-gorgeous blue-eyed baby girl. Her roots go deep. Deep down through pain, rejection, self-doubt, and searching, right down to the core of a girl who is someone you want on your team.


So meet Beka. If you ever find yourself crying in the back of a dusty closet, I hope someone like her lights up your phone. If not, I'm sure she would say the same to you...
"No matter what happens, no matter what...

This barefoot, mountain-loving, cloth-diapering, rough around the edges yankee girl loves you lots!


  1. Beka is so very great. I love reading about how awesome my friends are as I get to know them better :)

    ps.. She's amazing with all the kids she's around, too!

  2. I'm crying again just reading about this beautiful moment! Beka has definitely been that place of solace for me during the desert seasons of life over the past few years. She is one of my "voices of reason" that I trust with the deep, dark places in my heart. She knows what it means to full know and fully love...a precious and rare commodity!

    We are so uniquely blessed to have the community we have. The kind that you can do "dirty life with" as Rhoda would say! :)

  3. I love the both of you! I was sitting at breakfast next to Rebekah and across from you Andrea and I was like these two girls are the same in opposite ways! I am so glad that your friendship has seen the other side and come back! :)

    Rebekah, I love your friendship! You bring fun, laughter, and conviction!!! You are a treasure! Thanks for your continual encouragement and love!

    Love yall!!!

  4. Andrea,

    It is so amazing to see the work of God in such a raw and honest form. I sit in awe reading this, as I think upon how such a small leap of faith could leave such an imprint on both of our hearts. Calling you that night I didn't know what to expect, but it really turned into a moment that could only be orchestrated by Him. God is so great that way in how he uses the simple things to get us through our hardest places. What I didn't tell you before was that someone else once spoke those words to me when I was in my darkest hour. A lot of days that is what carried me through.

    One day when God uses your broken pieces to help along another hurting soul, you will be able to speak those same words with confidence. Confidence in an all-knowing God who always makes sure His beloved ones are okay. I just love you, Andrea. I am so proud of how you are vulnerably allowing God to use your story.

    Thanks for your precious words! I will hold them near to my heart forever.

    Love-- This Southern Belle

    (BTW: Someone should make a movie about us. A southern belle collides with a mountain loving Yankee and they become the dearest of friends!!)

  5. i am so proud to know and love both of you----you are both amazing women-strong and soft, full of compassion and grace. my heart is smiling

  6. Beka, has really pretty eyes.. You are very fortunate to have such a friend.. Love Kristi

  7. kristi - indeed she does! i am fortunate.

  8. Dear Beka, You are indeed so beautiful. Thank you for being you, and loving my sister and the Lord and speaking those life giving words to her. Your sister in Christ...

  9. this made my heart swell with pride that i actually get to do life with you and bekah- two amazing strong women!!! andrea this blog was so beautifully written, you really outdid yourself;)

    how fun is it that God brought us all together from all over the country, a beautiful quilt we have all been woven together with all of our similarities and differences making us stronger! i love you guys and am so proud to call you both friends of mine!!!!

  10. As I read the echoes of God's Love in the preceding blog and comments I am reminded of how good God is, and how he puts people in our lives to show His Love ... too often everyone goes their own way, sending out just crumbs of encouragement or just judgment. Oh to have the mind of Christ in All situations!
    Thank you -friends of Andrea- for being such good friends.

  11. this is beautiful. i echo what everyone has said (cause everyone has just poured out lovely words that i would have said).

    doing "dirty" life with ya'll..what a blessing.

    love you rebekah! and andrea!

  12. BEAUTIFUL!! This post was amazing, and encouraging and just beautiful. Andrea, great job of perfectly describing Rebekah. Y'all are so precious to me! Nikki