So today, I succumbed. I read the little e-mail in my overflowing inbox that said, "Have you taught your 18-month-old about circles and squares yet?"
Well dang it, no, I haven't.
I looked for her little head, hanging upside off the couch. "Maddie, do you know what a circle is?"
I took that as "no". My obsessive instincts took over and like the maniacal girl I am, I was suddenly determined she would do something intelligent today.
I scooped up a ball of the playdough I made yesterday. And yes, let's just talk about that for a second. I made it.
Why did I make playdough for my 18-month-old daughter who would do the inevitable?
She took one bite, spit it out in disgust and from there on it didn't matter how many cookie cutters or garlic presses I gave her. The playdough was not magical nor pretty. Because I had no food coloring, this lump of white, salty dough was tossed aside.
"What about coloring?"
"EEEEEEEEEEE!!!" she exclaimed. I gathered some paper, crayons and markers. My stomach flipped with joy as I drew shapes.
"See? A circle, a square and a triangle!" She blinked, mouth agape with a tiny string of drool stretching down to her collar. I don't know what I imagined for this moment, but I think there was a part of me that hoped she would grip a crayon in one hand and outline each, smiling brightly while saying the alphabet backwards.
I left her to her ingenius craft, and came back to discover she had decorated her entire body in pink marker and the dog was snacking on the crayons.
"What about bubbles?" A desperate attempt at entertainment? Yes. I gave her a bottle, something which is normal now for her. She's familiar with the technique and enjoys blowing her own bubbles. I gave her strict rules to not leave the kitchen rug, which is probably why she dumped the entire bottle of bubbles onto the kitchen rug and ran to me singing "bubbles! bubbles!"
We retreated to our respective corners. She to watch Elmo sing on T.V. Me to unsubscribe from whatever company sends me e-mails written by people who have obviously never spent time with children.
Please excuse me to rescue my couch from my dog, as he now is burying is newly wet & slobbered "meat" toy under my pillows.