Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Well, If I'm Going to be Honest

I have to be honest with you. There's a few reasons I've pared back my writing. And I'm going to be honest with you about them, because one thing I've always tried to do here is to be honest.  

One, it's hard to write transparently when you are guarding things in your heart.  

Two, I struggle with comparison. When I start to compare my writing, my thoughts, my heart here to other people and other places, death starts to seep into all creative sprouts. Comparison is deadly. And I'm fighting for the grace to get beyond it.  

Three, I don't like posting before I've lived it. So there's a whole lot of living. Beautiful stories spilling out on my couch and in cars, from my heart to others, and their questions outloud to me. A whole lot of living that I don't know is ready for dissecting or poetic lyric.

Four, I'm trying to figure out the whys and ifs and shoulds of writing and blogging. Don't get me wrong, I love it. It's a part of me, has been a part of me for the past eight years or so. So I've sat down to make a schedule. A plan. A goal for this space. Things like... more posts from my kitchen, thrifted living, stories of parenting, of community, of grace.

Five, I am the first to discount and discredit everything I write. I feel unqualified and inadequate. I think most writers and thinkers and creative sorts feel this way. In fact, I'd go so far to say that most people feel this way in different avenues of their lives.

Six, blogging takes energy and time and investment. And these days? Well, sometimes I'm just tired.

(even my Mom has to hear it from me)

Thanks for letting these fingers and heart write honestly. Vaguely, maybe. But honest, I promise.

And can you give me grace as I ebb and flow with this space?



  1. all is grace, friend. these are good questions and i'm right there with you!

    1. why did that show up so weird?
      this is me :)

    2. Weird!! But thanks friend. I'm glad I'm not the only one. :)

    3. Suzie - thanks! :) I think so too.

  2. I am exactly the same, more often than not! I want to write and write and write to my heart's content, but so often I find myself too tired or too lazy, and then blogging begins to feel more like an obligation than a hobby. Let's work on it together!

    <3 Daryl

    1. It's so hard for me when blogging feels like an obligation. That pressure just makes my fingers feel cold and my words empty. Keep writing! :)