A Saturday to Wash Clothes and Scrub a Heart

This morning, we stirred early. She snuggled up next to me last night, her tiny feet kicking against my stomach. This morning, I woke to see two, big blueish-greenish eyes inches from my own, her fingers against my cheeks, and her tiny sing-songy voice saying "Hi!".

We buzzed around before 8, together, her and I, eating gluten-free waffles, wiping sleep out of our still heavy lids. I felt a certain heaviness. The kind that nags at my peace, leaves me asking more questions than answers and forces me to really acknowledge issues I avoid.

She burned through a banana while I tried to catch a few minutes to read... Philippians 4 jumping out across the millenia to meet me face to face.

"Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise....  I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little.  For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength." 

— Philippians 4:6-13, NLT

Two recently read quotes pass through my mind...

• "God, who foresaw your tribulation, has specially armed you to go through it, not without pain but without stain." — C.S. Lewis
• "Just realized it's "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" not "through Christ who makes it easy." — Donald Miller (via @donmilleris)  

So the morning went on, books scattered are proof.  Laundry is washed, folded and put away, dinner recipe sits for prepping, she sleeps through the afternoon sun, and I write. I am taking great care to assess life around me, things within me, things unknown, and so on. And then I'm turning them to prayer. It's all I really can do.